Chapter 9: Date — I’m currently single.

💍

Yang Wei stared at him blankly for quite a while until finally bursting into a fit of giggles. “Are you filming a movie?”

Fang Cheng Ran’s lips slowly curved upward like silk threads being spun. “Are you willing to be my heroine then?” By chance, sunlight glinted off of his teeth as he smiled, making him look as handsome as an oil painting.

Yang Wei felt that, at this moment, there probably wasn’t any girl capable of refusing Fang Cheng Ran. She pursed her lips before flashing him a smile and stepping into his car. Once the enchanting Maserati had carried Yang Wei far off into the distance, a chubby security guard standing near the entrance took out his phone and opened Moments. (1)

「Announcing the answer:  The handsome guy finally drove off with the fifth grade art teacher, Teacher Yang, in a Maserati. The end.」

A moment later, all of Moments exploded.

Yang Wei tilted her head toward Fang Cheng Ran as she sat in the passenger seat and asked, “What type of food are we going to eat?”

“Western-style food,” Fang Cheng Ran paused and then added, “at Moon Lovers.”

『Moon Lovers』 advertised the line, ‘If you love her, then take her to Moon Lovers,’ and thus ostentatiously swindled A City for years with it. Yang Wei blinked and then let out an ‘oh’ as she came to a realization. As Fang Cheng Ran had just returned to the country, it meant that he probably didn’t know that subtext behind taking her to 『Moon Lovers』.

Because they’d left during rush hour, they encountered several traffic jams. Each one was torture to Yang Wei, as it inevitably meant that there’d be a meddlesome driver who’d honk at them.

Even if 『Moon Lovers』 was a romantic, western-style restaurant, Fang Cheng Ran’s extravagant Maserati still drew a lot of attention when it pulled up. Yang Wei glanced at Fang Cheng Ran, who was clothed in a black suit, and slightly tugged her lips to the side. “Should I have changed into formal attire before we came?”

Fang Cheng Ran opened her car door for her and then smiled as he said, “The waiters wouldn’t deign to lock the doors and reject a beautiful lady like you.”

Yang Wei laughed as she got out of the car. “Did you only visit Italy during your travels? I’ve heard that the men there are the world’s best smooth talkers.”

Fang Cheng Ran replied, “Most of what I said is the truth.”

Yang Wei lightly smiled and followed him inside.

『Moon Lovers』was decorated in such a way that it held a hazy, ambiguous feeling. The intended ambiance for visitors seemed to be that of a date between lovers beneath a moonlit sky. There were also several assorted miniature chocolate decorations inside of the restaurant, so that when guests entered, they’d feel as if the air held a hint of sweetness.

The head waiter that greeted them was very professional, and the bow he gave them having seemingly been perfectly measured with a compass to be both precise yet graceful. After leading them to their table, the waiter lit the candle and then paused. Fang Cheng Ran pulled out Yang Wei’s chair a step faster than the waiter before seating himself opposite her.

The waiter courteously handed Yang Wei a menu who, after glancing it over, ordered a few dishes. When he saw her do so, Fang Cheng Ran faintly smiled as he asked, “Do you frequently bring others here to eat?”

Yang Wei shook her head and replied, “No, why do you ask?”

“I can see that you’re quite used to ordering dishes here.”

“Eh…” Actually, she’d just subconsciously ordered the same dishes that she had when she’d gone on that ‘blind date’ with Qi Xiao Yan. Qi Xiao Yan didn’t like eating outside much in the first place; thus, a western-style restaurant like this was even further outside his range of consideration.

Apart from the first time when she’d met him, Yang Wei had only been here with Qi Xiao Yan a single time during Christmas last year—and it had only been because she’d spent half a day begging him before he’d graciously agreed.

In Yang Wei’s eyes, Qi Xiao Yan…this person’s romantic factor approached negative infinity. The only time he exposed an expression of infatuation was when it had to do with numbers. Hmm… it would also appear when he was being intimate with her.

“What’re you thinking about?” Fang Cheng Ran asked carefreely. Nevertheless, this made Yang Wei aware of the fact that her cheeks were burning slightly. She covered her mouth and coughed dryly before asking Fang Cheng Ran, “You invited me to this sort of place; aren’t you worried about your girlfriend misunderstanding?”

Fang Cheng Ran raised an eyebrow at her words and then replied, “If there truly was such a person, then I’d just explain the situation to her clearly.”

Yang Wei looked at him in disbelief. “No way. How could you possibly not have a girlfriend?”

Fang Cheng Ran sighed and helplessly admitted, “See, everyone always thinks that I have a girlfriend; thus, I’m still single to this day.

Yang Wei chuckled and said, “I don’t believe you. It must be that your standards for a girlfriend were too high; you’re surely in very high demand. You didn’t even have a girlfriend during university?”

Fang Cheng Ran replied, “Let’s not only talk about me; what about you? Do you have a boyfriend?”

Yang Wei froze and then frowned. “I’m currently single.”

The waiter arrived with their dishes soon after she said this, so they stopped conversing and began sampling the cuisine in front of them instead. The first dish was a salad, with the main course being Foie gras and the dessert being ice cream. All of it was extremely pleasing to Yang Wei. Nearby, a violinist dressed in a swallow-tailed coat was playing. His music of choice was Claude Debussy’s 《Clair de Lune》.

Fang Cheng Ran glanced at Yang Wei and asked with a smile, “Do you want me to call him over to play a song for you?”

“By all means, don’t!” Yang Wei almost choked on her ice cream when she heard his question. “That’d be too embarrassing.”

Fang Cheng Ran propped his chin on his palm and chuckled softly as he gazed at her.

Once they’d left the restaurant, Fang Cheng Ran invited Yang Wei to the movies, but when she saw the time, she shook her head and said, “I can’t. I have class at eight tonight.”

Fang Cheng Ran looked at her in puzzlement. “Tonight? What class?”

“I’m a part-time teacher for my friend’s art class. Tonight, there’s a trial class,” Yang Wei explained.

Fang Cheng Ran frowned. “What time does the class end? It’s not safe to return home too late into the night.”

Yang Wei blanked out for a moment and then clarified with a smile on her face, “No, it’s an online class.”

Fang Cheng Ran suddenly understood. “Alright then, I’ll invite you to the movies next time. Then, would you allow me to take you home, beautiful lady?”

Yang Wei couldn’t help but laugh. “You really seem to have been overseas for far too long; did you chase girls like this over there too?”

“Of course not.” Fang Cheng Ran’s lips curved into a smile as he opened the car door for Yang Wei.

When the car stopped in front of Yang Wei’s residence, Fang Cheng Ran looked at the luxurious apartment building in front of them and asked with a slightly accusatory tone, “Do you live her alone?”

“Oh, mn.” Yang Wei vaguely replied as she undid her seatbelt, planning to exit the car.

“Wait a minute.”

Fang Cheng Ran suddenly called out to her, causing Yang Wei to look back at him, confused. “What’s the matter?”

Fang Cheng Ran asked, “Is there really nothing else you need me to do for you?”

Yang Wei slightly raised her eyebrow, a small smile gracing her face. “Such as?”

“Do you really not need me to tell you my number?”

Yang Wei looked down, and her shoulders began to tremble as she laughed. “Classmate Fang Cheng Ran, I absolutely don’t believe that you’ve never had a girlfriend before.””

Fang Cheng Ran didn’t comment; he only took his phone and looked at her meaningfully.

His eyes were very pretty; when they looked at you, it made you feel as if only you existed in his world..

Yang Wei withdrew her phone and exchanged numbers with him. She then waved farewell and fled from the car.

💍

Qi Xiao Yan was currently staying at the university’s teaching and research building. Besides the course he taught, he also had three graduate students beneath him. These graduate students were actually teacher assistants, so he dropped all of the introductory course material onto them without restraint.

One of these three graduate students was a girl. When she heard from her fellow students that Qi Xiao Yan had gotten divorced, she was also a bit eager to try and pursue him.

One of the male graduate students glanced at her from the side and apathetically pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I heard that Professor Qi used a math exam to abuse the third years yesterday. If you think that you haven’t been abused enough yet, go ahead.”

Female Student: “…”

She still passionately loved her life.

Qi Xiao Yan suddenly stood up from his chair, causing the three students to immediately lower their heads to indicate that they were very busy. However, Qi Xiao Yan only tidied up the materials on his desk and then left without saying anything.

The female student listened to his footsteps fade away. Only after confirming that he was far away did she whisper, “What’s up with him?”

The male student remarked, “I only know that he was looking at his phone the entire time he was sitting there.”

The female student’s eyes widened in disbelief. It seemed that even Professor Qi had suffered a heavy blow from getting divorced! Had he been staring at his phone because he’d only ever used it to call and text?

This had indeed been true previously, but now that he’d gotten a divorce, the only way he could learn of Yang Wei’s affairs was through his phone, which was why the sole app installed on it was Weibo.

He knew that Yang Wei had had his account follow all of her colleagues on his behalf, so what had one of those colleagues said just a moment ago? A handsome guy had picked up Yang Wei in a Maserati? Hehehe, she’d only been divorced for three days, yet she’d already found her next target; her hands were quite fast.

Therefore, when he opened Yang Wei’s Weibo and saw that she hadn’t posted any pics from her date, his mood lightened somewhat. At the top of her page was a post about a drawing training course, which mentioned that there was a trial class tonight that everyone was welcome to attend. Qi Xiao Yan thought for a moment; he should also be included in ‘everyone.’

When he returned to his dorm, he located the contact details of the drawing class in Yang Wei’s post and downloaded the customized learning software according to her instructions. He then registered an account and joined as soon as the clock struck eight.

「Welcome, Student Li Gou Dan, (2) to our drawing classroom ^_^」

This welcome message automatically popped up when he entered and disappeared soon after. Following which, Yang Wei’s voice came through his speakers, 【Hello, everyone. I’m this period’s illustrations teacher, Flower Buns. I welcome everyone who’s listening in on my trial lesson.】

Qi Xiao Yan’s eyes glinted faintly as he plugged in his headphones and put them on.

Future Mr. Perfect: 「233333 Teacher, do you really like to eat steamed flower buns?」  

A row of purple words suddenly appeared on the screen. Qi Xiao Yan swept his gaze over the computer screen, finally landing on the chat box in the lower left-hand corner where messages could be sent.

Li Gou Dan: 「:)」  

Yang Wei stared blankly at the name for a while. What kind of name was Li Gou Dan, hahaha! She opened the powerpoint presentation she’d prepared in advance while replying to the student’s question from before, 【Not Flower Buns as in a steamed flower bun, but as in the loose curls hairstyle.

Her voice was significantly clearer than before—it was as if she speaking directly into his ear from beside him. Qi Xiao Yan was very satisfied.

Future Mr. Perfect: 「What damn loose curls hairstyle? 233333」  

Li Gou Dan: 「:)」  

Yang Wei stared at the outdated smiley. Was Student Li Gou Dan a mute? She glanced at the number of viewers and saw that it had already reached forty-six, which meant that she could go ahead and start class.

【This trial class is only two hours long, and today’s lesson topic is scenery. When you want to draw scenery, you must first have a grasp of perspective.】 Yang Wei said and then clicked on the next powerpoint slide. 【Like in this image of a railroad track, we are most familiar with a one-third perspective. Everyone should first notice how the two tracks aren’t parallel. Furthermore, they eventually disappear into some distant point, yet if you look carefully, you can also see that even the trees on the side have a type of perspective.】

She used her her stylus to annotate the image on-screen with her digital tablet. 【Suppose that this tree is A, this tree is B, and this tree is C. The distance between AB is l, whereas the distance between BC is k…】

Future Mr. Perfect: 「It’s changed into a math class in a split second…」  

Qi Qi’s Meow: 「I heard that Teacher Flower Buns’ husband is a mathematics professor?」  

Eating Skinny: 「Teacher Flower Buns is already married?!!!」

Yang Wei glanced at the chat box. Qi Qi’s Meow had been a student in a previous class of hers, one where she’d mentioned the fact that her husband was a mathematics professor. But now, however…

【He’s my ex-husband now.】   

Qi Qi’s Meow: 「『alarmed』『alarmed』『alarmed』」

Eating Skinny: 「Does that mean that I have a chance now?」

Li Gou Dan: 「:)」  

Student Future Mr. Perfect had been stunned at the news and was staring at his computer blankly. When he’d heard Teacher Flower Buns’ voice previously, he’d felt that it sound similar to Teacher Yang’s. However, when he read that someone had heard her husband was a mathematics professor, he’d become even more certain. Thus, this meant…that Teacher Yang was divorced?!

Liang Ming Hao suddenly felt somewhat uneasy. He gulped down a mouthful of milk to calm down, then entered into the chat box, alarmed, 「Teacher Flower Buns, where are you from?」

Yang Wei replied, 【I’m from A City.】  

Future Mr. Perfect: 「I’m also from A City! Are you a professional illustrator?」  

【I’m not. I teach art at a primary school.】

Liang Ming Hao: “…”

He felt that, this time, his uncle needed to help him pay for this term’s art class.

💍

Author’s Note:

The second male lead’s romantic power VS the male lead’s romantic power: The second male lead has obtained a crushing victory.

Male Lead: Let’s compete in math .

Second Male Lead: …Who wants to compete with you in that?!

Male Lead: Then let’s compete in idiot (gap moe) power.

Second Male Lead: … You win.

Male Lead: 🙂

Lastly, expressing thanks to sponsors~~

Thank you darlings~ =3=


Footnotes:

(1) Social-networking function of the Chinese app ‘Wechat’

(2) Gou Dan as in “dog egg” (狗蛋) … There’s actually a whole backstory behind this. But essentially, this is a meme in China, originating from 《 One Hundred Thousand Bad Jokes 》  (李狗蛋) Li Gou Dan: internet slang; refers to having a soft, feminine face and a strong, manly body. Because… a delicate and pretty face made Li Jing mistakenly believe someone was a girl, only for them to be a healthy, robust male with terrifyingly exaggerated muscles.


Translator’s Note:

RIP can’t really do a prank without messing up the categorization…click the link on the chapter title anyways if you want to see what the readers of my other TPU novels had to deal with, hehe.

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