Mob Chapter 32: That is a threat! What do you want me to do?
First published in Ainushi
I sat on the edge of the bed as Suou kneeled in front of me. I never asked him to kneel. I never said it! What on earth does this guy want to do. Honestly I don’t understand nor do I want to understand. I have a feeling that it’s going to be too troublesome.
[Hey! Why did you take off the blindfold? Won’t I die if I look at your eyes!?]
Although it is only a rumor, they do say that there isn’t any smoke without fire; I’m sure there’s probably something. But since I don’t know what that is I became needlessly more scared since human beings feel anxiety and fear of things they don’t understand.
[Didn’t I tell you that it was okay? The blindfold was only to make the rumors seem true. Nothing will happen even if you look at my eyes now]
I did look at his eyes at that time and indeed nothing happened. Time passed and nothing happened so what he said is probably true. I slowly turned my eyes back to Suou. As expected nothing happened as I looked into his eyes.
Suou eyes are a very beautiful crimson color. I liked it to the extent that if there was nothing to do I would like to keep looking at it. I quite like those eyes of his.
[Now…you say, does it mean you can consciously do something with it?]
He also said it at the Chief’s office but “now” means that there are times when he can’t as well. Though I don’t know if it depends on time or if it’s’ up to his will. If it is the latter, I would be really scared!
[Ahh, it’s fine right now. Though there might be some effects from now on…well it should be alright]
Hm!? You shouldn’t take off your blindfold if there’s going to be some effects from now right? It’s not good. Unconsciously, I averted my eyes, and when I tried to quickly sneak back he suddenly took my two hands and gripped them on my knees.
My eyes that were averted suddenly stiffened unintentionally, as I was surprised. I couldn’t turn my eyes away from Suou’s serious eyes. Was there something important he had to say?
[Please tell me your name]
From the first encounter until now he had treated me rudely calling me either brat or just hey you, so why is he asking now? Is it something he had to ask so seriously?
[This memory of grief engraved in my left eye will probably become something meaningful it if is of use to you. This magic power asleep in my right eye will also become a strong power to continue on the path of hope if it’s together with you. I swear on my memories and blood of Philight inherited from the founder…from now on I will be your 『Wait a second!?』…tsk]
This guy, he just clicked his tongue right now!? Wait, was I wrong to interrupt his speech…? No, I didn’t do anything wrong at all! This guy just suddenly started to blabber on about something indiscernible that felt extremely scary on his own!!
[You…You! What the hell are you saying? What is Philight? Swear what!? What are you swearing about! Don’t tell me! Just stay quiet now!!]
I put all my strength and flung his hand off mine, and this time I retreated back. I somehow made some distance and glared at Suou.
When I thought he was asking about my name, he suddenly started talking about his left eye and right eye and swearing on his blood and memories…what’s with that? So scary! I really don’t understand. I want to escape! It’s fine to run away right!? Unintentionally, I almost used teleportation but I stiffened at Suou’s words.
[I will die the moment you run away from here without listening to me and telling me your name]
What did you say!? Will you be satisfied if I just tell you my name and listen to you? No, that can’t be. There is absolutely no way he will be satisfied with just me telling him my name. Moreover, you will die if I run away, such a light life!? But this guy will probably really die if I run away. I can’t even laugh as I could strangely feel that it’s true.
[Are you an idiot, no wait you are an idiot. I have a bad feeling so I will absolutely not tell you my name. I also don’t need any oath. That’s why there is no need for me to listen to you! There is only one thing I wish and that’s–for you to quickly get out of my room and return to your inn, that’s all!]
While slowly rubbing his hand that was flung off by me, Suou intently gazed at me. He didn’t show any signs of returning at all. If there was a change, it was that the air around him, suddenly becoming cold as he listened to me speak.
This, this isn’t good. It feels like an extremely bad air. Although I don’t know what or how bad it is, at any rate, it is bad.
[If you do the things you need to do, any wish will soon come true. First, you need to do the things you want to do before everything else.]
At the same time, Suou took something out his chest with quick movements and continued on with flowing movements. Although it seemed like I was about to be impressed by the beautiful movements, I didn’t have such leisure. Instantly, I leaped forward from the bed and grasped both of his wrists tightly.
A firm sound rang from the impact of clasping his wrists and the shock ran through my whole body and to the bed as it creaked. Suou was holding a dagger and the edge of the dagger stopped right at the nape of his neck. No, I am stopping it. As we both tried to struggle for the dagger, the dagger started to shake.
[What on earth are you thinking!? Let go of this! Right now!!]
[If you did what you want, our talk wouldn’t have continued, no matter how many hours we spent.
No matter what happens I won’t let you go. You will become my master. For that I will do anything]
!? It’s fine if the conversation doesn’t continue! What, you won’t let me go…master!? That would be a lot of work and you say you will do anything but shouldn’t there be a limit? In a sense, isn’t this a threat?
[You are saying whatever you want again. Haa. I feel exhausted; are you doing this on purpose?
But, if this is a threat, then I guess it means that you have a certain importance to me]
I unconsciously become stunned as he smiles at my words. So he can smile so gently and happily like this…this idiot. I’m also stunned at the words I said without thinking but more than that I couldn’t say anything to Suou’s expression. I probably would have been even more stunned if we weren’t in this struggle.
But don’t poke at my sore spot! He’s a really irritating guy. He is still the most irritating and troublesome guy I’ve ever met, but somehow I can’t leave him be and it’s true this is a threat to me. Seriously, what is with this guy.
Only, I feel that it would be regretful not being able to see those beautiful eyes, but would you say this is the reason for feeling this kind of attachment? No, there is definitely no way I feel attached to this idiot!
[Your and my perception of “importance” is probably different, you know? If it’s the importance you are talking about then I don’t feel it. If it’s about whether something is important or not, you probably merely think to the extent that you don’t want that something to die. That’s why, can please stop already and move away!?]
It came out a bit awkward! That’s why I would like it if you quickly let go of that dagger. Our struggle with the dagger was still ongoing. Out of desperation, I glared at Suou while I said that although it came out awkwardly. From now on remember to make facial expressions!
[Importance…it certainly is like that, but that doesn’t matter right now. For you to become my master–that is everything to me. If it doesn’t happen then it’s the same as being dead]
What is this I wonder, suddenly I feel really irritated.
[I definitely won’t become your master. Who would want to become the master of a guy who treats his life so lightly! Giving me such a despicable threat and saying it’s the same as being dead, go and die somewhere I won’t know!
In the first place, I have my hands full which just my own life. How would I take responsibility for another person’s life? If you are looking for importance from people then I’m out of the question. Find someone else! Would you normally risk your life to for guy like the one you just met today? Why is it me? Isn’t anyone else fine?]
[No! I want you!! When I first saw you I doubted my eyes. I have never seen anyone as beautiful as you. When I say beautiful, I’m not only talking about your outer appearance. I thought about it as I looked and talked with you, it can’t be anyone else but you. If you become my master then this life of mine would also have some value!]
[Haa? Don’t joke around! Life had value from the start! The most important!! Even if I become your master it doesn’t change! It’s not something that changes just because you follow someone!? Also isn’t there something wrong with your eyes!? Think of a better reason.
Well, though no matter whatever reason you come up with its useless. I’m going to go to Tournons. Right now I am devotedly involved in doing what I can for that purpose so I really have my hands full. I can do things for myself. In other words, I can only do things for myself. I can’t afford to take responsibility for another person’s life]
I said something ridiculous since you said it with so much desperation. There is nothing that has no value in life. Everyone is important. Although there may be exceptions but that isn’t the problem right now.
But, but…I know my face the best. It is a very mediocre and normal face. It’s in the middle of okay. It’s on the top of the bad list! I can only hear sarcasm if an ikemen compliments on my appearance! Ikemens explode!!
[Jokes and everything aside I am serious. It’s like that in my surroundings. If you ask the people around me they will say I have no value. Even my clan will probably shun me. There was probably no point in me being born.
Also, my eyes aren’t weird. Your surroundings are always wrapped in a warm light. It is probably magic but it is very comforting. Also, you yourself are also very warm. You recognize me as myself, converse with me naturally, worry about me and say your thanks. I’ve never felt so happy. There is no one who is as warm and beautiful inside and outside like you.
I won’t be settling down in any country permanently, here or anywhere else, so don’t worry. I will follow you wherever. Besides, it’s not that I want you to take responsibility for my life. My life is my own. If I were to use my power in this life, I want to use it for your sake]
[No…doesn’t that make you feel the burden of your life? Am I wrong? I don’t understand. It’s not only you who has no reason for being born, it’s like that for most people. Really, you are a guy who thinks too troublesomely.
Haa~. So, the light around me? Can you see the magic power? I haven’t seen around me before so I don’t know, and I also don’t know about the warmth. Well fine. So that’s what you mean by outer appearance…]
No, well I knew it already. But, why is it that I got a little bit of a shock…wuu.
[What about your surroundings? Are you talking about your environment? I guess clans are really strict. Though I don’t really know.
At any rate, all the things you said are all ordinary things, right? Even if you say it’s warm although I only did normal things. Saying you only want me, since it’s about being your master, shouldn’t there be more to it? Also, it’s normally scary if you are going to follow me everywhere, so please stop. I also don’t need you to use your power for my sake, use it for yourself]
[I can’t use my power unless I have a master, so currently I can’t use it for my own sake. Well, that doesn’t matter.
You say its ordinary things but it’s not for me. More than anything, you gave me a name. I am sure I told you at that time “take responsibility”]
When Suou shows an expression that looks like he is about to cry, he forcibly smiles, and I end up not being say anything. What feelings does one have to hold to show such an expression, that I don’t know. I don’t think this expression is just a lie for the oath. I did think that he just wants to use the powers he isn’t able to unless he has a master, but it’s hard to ask the Suou right now….
[Even if you say name, I only made up a name to call you? To take responsibility for that, isn’t it weird?
Moreover, isn’t it that you just want to use the powers you can’t use unless you have a master?]
It’s only a name I made to call him because I didn’t like the name Latu. It shouldn’t be such a big deal to take responsibility for…although that is what I think, looking at Suou’s expression it feels like it isn’t. Also when I said that he just wants to use the power he can’t use unless he has a master, Suou clearly looked hurt. Looking at his expression, I gulped. Honestly I don’t know what I should say or what I should do.
I am refusing him but he doesn’t get it, what on earth should I do?!!